So this blog post is going to be in letter form. Multiple letters, to the people/things in Japan that I feel need to receive these letters.
Dear Japan,
Please get road signs. Everyone keeps telling me names of roads to turn on to get to places that I need to go to. Unfortunately, there are no signs telling me what the actual roads are named. That's right. I said it. YOU NEED ROAD SIGNS JAPAN. It is rather frustrating when people just assume you have an innate knowledge of road names. You know what happens when you assume.... You make me look really stupid. I was not born here. I am rather obviously foreign. WHY DO YOU INSIST ON TELLING ME UNINTELLIGIBLE ROAD NAMES THAT DO NOT EXIST?!?!? I think everyone here is just making these names up. I don't appreciate it. Unless I see some signs in the near future that have aforementioned unintelligible road names on them, I will continue to believe this is just one big conspiracy.
Yours,
Clare
Dear Awkward Couple,
Yes yes, we all know you two are very much in love. Now it would be rather nice if you could stop being very much in love WHILE WALKING. You insist on holding hands and taking up the entire sidewalk I am biking on. I know you can hear me coming up behind you, my bike makes a lot of noise. I also have a little bell, that I ring to let you know I AM RIGHT HERE. I don't ring it for my own amusement, as fun as it may be. So when I ring my bell, please let go of each other, and move to the side for the three seconds it takes for me to pass you. If you don't, I will passive aggressively ride right behind you, ringing my bell the entire time. Yes, that's right, I am a jerk like that. As long as I am not in a hurry, I will ride so close to you that you can hear my music, and I will ring my bell as loudly as I can. Don't bother turning around to glare at me, I really don't care. I have no shame. Just remember, all this can be avoided if you just move over and let me pass.
With love,
Clare
Typhoons-
You're kind of like a lame hurricane. Nobody actually wants you here. Please leave.
-Clare
